Bye Bye, My Dear Friend
22 July 2008, Kuala Lumpur
The weather was friendly. Traffic in the morning was hectic as usual. Everyone was rushing to get to their destination on time. Parents sending their children to school, employees hurrying to their workplace, employers getting to their office premise as quickly as they could, etc....the list is endless....
At the office I was busy as always, managing the department and making sure that deadlines for the day would be met wisely. In between meetings and heaps of papers, I managed to be at an important meeting on time, well, maybe slightly off time, but still considered on time since the meeting had not started yet. The meeting was about getting the organization to be aired on television and at the same time trying to 'sell' the brand name. All in all, the meeting went well and hopefully we'll be on air before the end of the year. By noon, I was feeling a bit tired. I went out for lunch with a colleague and had a light meal because I already had quite a heavy breakfast earlier.
The rest of the afternoon was okay and nothing major had happened which I had to solve or look through. Apparently, all my staff were cooperative and diligent on this day. I had to entertain a few phone calls at around 4 in the afternoon and the discussion went on smoothly. I was glad because it looked like a mega project would be on its way soon.
Time really flew without hesitating. Time didn't not wait for anything at this moment. Without realising it, it was already time to go back and the time to shut the computer down. At the point when I was about to shut down my laptop, an email came in and the subject of it caught my attention - Innalillah....I was wondering about whose parents had passed away now......I quickly clicked on the email and it was from a dear friend of mine, Ila. I read the email in a glance and I had a shock of my life. Oh God! I was shocked!!! I couldn't believe my eyes and brain at that time. Suddenly I felt the earth shaking and I was trembling like hell......I wanted to run away but I couldn't seem to move my legs and my body went numb all over.....My dear friend Shera had passed away in a tragic car accident!!!!!! Oh no!!! This couldn't be true.....Ila must be joking....yup, I immediately replied the email and told her (no, I yelled at her actually) that she must be joking because I just read a comment by Shera in my blog a few moments ago.
I tried to give Ila a call but to no avail. And I tried to call everyone else but everybody seemed busy and no one answered my calls.....I was desperate by now and my hands were shaking like anything. Finally, I could get hold of Ila and she told me that Shera's brother called her and informed about Shera. I was indeed in huge shock. I couldn't believe my ears....all of a sudden, everything around me turned grey and flashes of Shera when we were studying together appeared in front of me and as though playing movies in my mind...My head spinned, my ears numbed and my body trembled. One by one, my friends called me and we conveyed the terrible news to each other. We cried our hearts out, yes, for losing a good friend is never easy.
I wanted to go to her parents' house that night but apparently, the funeral would only be held the next day. Early in the morning, I asked my husband to accompany me to the funeral and I called office to inform that I needed the whole day off. On the way to the funeral, my heart was beating so hard I was sure my husband could hear it. When I called Lynn, she said that they have brought the body to a surau nearby and Lynn asked me to go straight to the surau. We made our way to the surau and I guessed I was a little bit late because everybody was already on their way to the graveyard. We decided to follow the convoy and slowly moved towards the graveyard at Sec. 21, Shah Alam.
There, I saw a few friends with swollen eyes.....they had been crying and their expressions were extremely solemn. We hugged each other as we watched the body being lowered onto the ground. Again, flashes of our time together, things that we did together played rapidly in front of my eyes and in my mind. When the body was finally buried, we cried again together knowing that Shera was no longer with us and we would never see her anymore. Looking at her husband, I knew that he was deeply frustrated with the tragedy and he cried so hard that he had to hold on to someone. Her daughters aged 5 and 2 seemed to understand that their mother had gone to sleep forever but yet, they were too young to compute the whole situation. Be strong and be brave, my dears, your mother is safe now with the Almighty.
And as for me, I knew it would be some time until I finally would be able to let go. It is my first ever experience losing a good friend and I would never thought it would hurt me this way. I felt so hurt inside knowing that now, I wouldn't be able to laugh at Shera's comments in my blogs, her motivating words, her cheerfulness and her determination in my blogs......Everytime I posted entries in my blog, I just knew that Shera would definitely be amongst the first put her cheeky yet inspiring comments in my entries no matter what. And I just loved reading her comments as they undoubtedly made my days and lifted up my spirit whenever I felt down and frustrated. Shera seemed to have all the right words to console a friend and she had always been that way since the first time I met her.
The times that we had together would always be treasured and remain in my heart and goodbye, I'm going to have one last cry for you now.....
Rest in peace, my dear friend, I know you are safe now with Allah swt.
Al-Fatihah.
The weather was friendly. Traffic in the morning was hectic as usual. Everyone was rushing to get to their destination on time. Parents sending their children to school, employees hurrying to their workplace, employers getting to their office premise as quickly as they could, etc....the list is endless....
At the office I was busy as always, managing the department and making sure that deadlines for the day would be met wisely. In between meetings and heaps of papers, I managed to be at an important meeting on time, well, maybe slightly off time, but still considered on time since the meeting had not started yet. The meeting was about getting the organization to be aired on television and at the same time trying to 'sell' the brand name. All in all, the meeting went well and hopefully we'll be on air before the end of the year. By noon, I was feeling a bit tired. I went out for lunch with a colleague and had a light meal because I already had quite a heavy breakfast earlier.
The rest of the afternoon was okay and nothing major had happened which I had to solve or look through. Apparently, all my staff were cooperative and diligent on this day. I had to entertain a few phone calls at around 4 in the afternoon and the discussion went on smoothly. I was glad because it looked like a mega project would be on its way soon.
Time really flew without hesitating. Time didn't not wait for anything at this moment. Without realising it, it was already time to go back and the time to shut the computer down. At the point when I was about to shut down my laptop, an email came in and the subject of it caught my attention - Innalillah....I was wondering about whose parents had passed away now......I quickly clicked on the email and it was from a dear friend of mine, Ila. I read the email in a glance and I had a shock of my life. Oh God! I was shocked!!! I couldn't believe my eyes and brain at that time. Suddenly I felt the earth shaking and I was trembling like hell......I wanted to run away but I couldn't seem to move my legs and my body went numb all over.....My dear friend Shera had passed away in a tragic car accident!!!!!! Oh no!!! This couldn't be true.....Ila must be joking....yup, I immediately replied the email and told her (no, I yelled at her actually) that she must be joking because I just read a comment by Shera in my blog a few moments ago.
I tried to give Ila a call but to no avail. And I tried to call everyone else but everybody seemed busy and no one answered my calls.....I was desperate by now and my hands were shaking like anything. Finally, I could get hold of Ila and she told me that Shera's brother called her and informed about Shera. I was indeed in huge shock. I couldn't believe my ears....all of a sudden, everything around me turned grey and flashes of Shera when we were studying together appeared in front of me and as though playing movies in my mind...My head spinned, my ears numbed and my body trembled. One by one, my friends called me and we conveyed the terrible news to each other. We cried our hearts out, yes, for losing a good friend is never easy.
I wanted to go to her parents' house that night but apparently, the funeral would only be held the next day. Early in the morning, I asked my husband to accompany me to the funeral and I called office to inform that I needed the whole day off. On the way to the funeral, my heart was beating so hard I was sure my husband could hear it. When I called Lynn, she said that they have brought the body to a surau nearby and Lynn asked me to go straight to the surau. We made our way to the surau and I guessed I was a little bit late because everybody was already on their way to the graveyard. We decided to follow the convoy and slowly moved towards the graveyard at Sec. 21, Shah Alam.
There, I saw a few friends with swollen eyes.....they had been crying and their expressions were extremely solemn. We hugged each other as we watched the body being lowered onto the ground. Again, flashes of our time together, things that we did together played rapidly in front of my eyes and in my mind. When the body was finally buried, we cried again together knowing that Shera was no longer with us and we would never see her anymore. Looking at her husband, I knew that he was deeply frustrated with the tragedy and he cried so hard that he had to hold on to someone. Her daughters aged 5 and 2 seemed to understand that their mother had gone to sleep forever but yet, they were too young to compute the whole situation. Be strong and be brave, my dears, your mother is safe now with the Almighty.
And as for me, I knew it would be some time until I finally would be able to let go. It is my first ever experience losing a good friend and I would never thought it would hurt me this way. I felt so hurt inside knowing that now, I wouldn't be able to laugh at Shera's comments in my blogs, her motivating words, her cheerfulness and her determination in my blogs......Everytime I posted entries in my blog, I just knew that Shera would definitely be amongst the first put her cheeky yet inspiring comments in my entries no matter what. And I just loved reading her comments as they undoubtedly made my days and lifted up my spirit whenever I felt down and frustrated. Shera seemed to have all the right words to console a friend and she had always been that way since the first time I met her.
The times that we had together would always be treasured and remain in my heart and goodbye, I'm going to have one last cry for you now.....
Rest in peace, my dear friend, I know you are safe now with Allah swt.
Al-Fatihah.
Comments
Such a beautiful farewell. I was waiting for this entry frm you actually. I finally manage to let go. But it is still very hard for me to visit her blog.
Al-Fatihah to arwah...
ps- You've been tagged. Visit me at your free time.
Yup...so hard to let go yet still have to do it.....I don't visit her blog anymore, I find it difficult to do so, but seriously, if it's so hard for us, imagine her family...